Who You'd be Today
by lucy.spiller.matt.albie
Summary: Monica and Chandler have been married, and they find out some good news, bad news, and some new news, and the entire cast helps them through their hardships, and absolute sarrow.
1. Chapter 1

Who you'd be today

Who you'd be today

Disclaimer-I do not own FRIENDS, and some of these storylines are from my friend, and I, but I do not own it, or have an affiliation to anyone on the show.

As Monica Geller was stirring a pot of boiling water, filled with pasta, she breathed in shallowly, and quickly, as she rushed around. Monica loved her job, and she took joy in what she did. She loved being the boss, and loved coming to work every day. When Monica wasn't on the top, she didn't understand, and it caused her to be quite frustrated with herself, and the people that she worked with. But once she was on the top, Monica loved the leadership, and her abilities to be overpowering. When she finished a few plates of food, she handed them to a waiter, and walked over to the locker rooms. In the process of going towards the locker rooms, she talked to a few of her coworkers in passing, telling them that she was leaving for the night, and that she'd see them in the morning. Monica finally got into the locker room, after clocking out, and changed into a pair of jeans, and a t-shirt, tying her tennis shoes, and pulled her hair into a tight ponytail on her head. Grabbing her purse she walked towards her Porsche that she had received from her father, as a gift, she opened the door to her car, and slide in. As Monica buckled her seat belt, she started it, and thought about how she was happy to just get home, and see Chandler.

Once home, she got out of her car, and walked up the flight of stairs up to her apartment in New York, she made her way to apartment twenty. When she got inside, she put her purse onto the hall tree, and called out her husband's name. "Chandler?" Monica said walking over to the refrigerator. She grabbed a water bottle, and then called his name out again. "Chandler?" She said closing the door of the fridge, and walked around the table, looking around the corner for him. As she looked around the corner, and started to walk towards their bedroom, there Chandler was, sticking his head inside the apartment.

"Out here." Chandler spoke smoothly to her. "We need to talk." As he told her that, Monica nodded, and walked onto the balcony on the other side of the window. Chandler elbows were on the ledge, as the light wind blew in Monica's face, her hair flowing lightly, as she stood next to him, and rested her elbows on the ledge as well.

Monica took a deep breath through her nose, and let it out slowly through her mouth. "What's up?" She asked him, and looked into Chandler's eyes, a little scared of what he needed to talk to her about. Monica waited for Chandler to respond, and looked into his blue eyes, hoping it wasn't anything horrible, but she knew by the tone of his voice, this was something quite serious.

"I didn't realize how beautiful it is at sunset." Chandler spoke smoothly, and looked away from Monica. He paused, and looked down, taking a deep breath. "Is there anything you'd like to tell me?" Chandler asked, and then glanced up at Monica, giving her a chance to talk to him, and so she could tell him what he had just found out.

When Chandler told Monica about this, she couldn't believe it. She shook her head, and wondered what he could possibly be talking about. Monica just shook her head, and spoke softly to her husband. "No..." She muttered, and then said. "I have no idea what you are talking about. Seriously you are freaking me out what's up?" Monica asked him, speaking in the back of her throat, as she continued to freak out, and wonder what was going on.

"I met someone today." Chandler told Monica, and nodded, trying not to cry. He spoke without Monica permission, and then said. "I met our daughter today." Chandler admitted, he couldn't believe it, he didn't know why the woman he had married had lied to her. He waited for an explanation, and looked up at Monica with his soft eyes, and into hers. "Start talking Monica."

Monica nodded, and looked down; she swallowed hard, and breathed out. "You did?" Monica didn't know what to really say to that, she had been caught. She nodded. "Oh. How did you know it was her, and where did you meet her?" Monica asked him, not speaking at all about what had happened in her past, knowing she would have to at some point.

"Monica.. He stated her name" Chandler spoke, not making any sense. He took a breath in, and then spoke again. "Gunther introduced her downstairs." He said, talking about the manager of the coffee shop downstairs from their apartment. "She was performing, she has a beautiful voice." Chandler admitted. "Alexandria Geller-Bing." He said, telling Monica her name. "Which I assume you know, you need to start talking, what happened?" Chandler paused, and bit his lip, putting his hand into her pockets.

"I didn't know what to do! I was a freshman in college.." She shrugged. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to feel bad, and.. just." She paused, not making any sense. "I need to sit down." She muttered, and sat down on a chair on the balcony. "Chandler.. Listen to me. I was freshman in college, we had slept together." Monica nodded, knowing he had remembered. "I got pregnant, and I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to feel obligated." She paused. "I've always wanted kids, but it really wasn't the time.. so I gave her up for adoption. What does she look like?" Monica asked wondering.

Chandler turned towards Monica, with his hands still safely in his pockets. "Like us." He spoke softly, and looked down. "You should have told me." Chandler told her honestly, as he had no idea that he had a daughter.

As Chandler spoke to her, Monica tried not to have a panic attack, as her head started to hurt extremely bad, as she choked back tears. "Chandler in college you would have just hated me, and it would have not been that great. Plus we never saw each other, except Thanksgiving, and by the next Thanksgiving, I had already given her up." Monica said to him, folding her arms over her chest.

"Don't say that Monica. I would have helped you." Chandler admitted, honestly. "I just.. I would have been scared about it, but I've always liked you Monica." He told her, and breathed out. "

Rolling her eyes, Monica leaned back in the chair, her arms still across her chest. "You didn't always like me." When Monica was a senior in high school, she was overweight, and she had lost the weight because Chandler had told her brother Ross that Monica was fat, and Monica had overheard what he had said.

Chandler breathed out. "You know I can't believe you lied to me. All these years we had known each other you could have mentioned hey, we have a daughter, and oh by the way she's sixteen!" Chandler told her, doing math in his head, making an estimation of their daughter's age. "But I can't see you right now." He said walking through the window and into their apartment.

Monica walked in after him, and called out for Chandler. "Chandler, I am sorry okay?" She said running after him, as the door slammed in her face. She closed her eyes, and pulled away from the door, and looked down. She couldn't believe that this had happened, and the mistake that she had made. Monica hoped he would come back, as she walked slowly towards their bedroom, and sat on the edge of the bed. Monica slumped down on the couch, and waited for him to return.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N:This is the next chapter, I hope you all enjoy it as you did the first! Comments are greatly appreciated.

When Chandler hadn't returned, she didn't understand why he wouldn't show up again. Actually she understood perfectly why he wasn't showing up, and she had to relax about it. Being Monica she couldn't just relax about it. She wanted what was best for her child, and she hoped that he was going to come back around. Chandler had to turn back around, wouldn't he? She breathed in and out, as she listened to the pounding of her own heart. She knew this had to work out, they always worked things out, but nothing this big had ever happened to their relationship. She should have told Chandler when she was pregnant, but now she had to live through it. Monica could do this, she had to, she needed to, and part of her wanted to because it had been her choice in the first place.

Once Chanlder returned home, a little later that night, Monica was lying down in their bed, as she laid on her back, a tear stained face, and a pillow underneath her head. She heard him rustle in, and knew to somehow keep her mouth shut, even though she really wanted to talk to him, she had to stay quiet. Chandler walked over to the bed, and sat down, taking off his shoes, and clothing to get into his pajamas, he finally spoke.  
"I talked to her." He admitted, and got under the covers, pulling the covers over his body.

Monica nodded, and didn't look at him, as they talked in their pitch black bedroom, which her eyes had slowly gotten used to. "Oh? You did?" She asked him, a little confused, and amazed that he had infact walked up to her. "How is she?" Monica asks. "Does she know who you are? Did you tell her?" Monica asked, asking about a million questions, as she mind continued to race. She breathed in and out. "Sorry.. Answer the questions I asked you first." Monica admitted, and out out a shallow breath, listening to her husband's breathing.

"No, she doesn't know who I am, she is fine I suppose, we just talked about a few things, about her singing, and stuff like that." Chandler stated shrugging. "Can we talk about this in the morning, I am quite tired." He admitted to Monica, as he let out a quick yawn, settling down in the bed.

"Yeah, sure." Monica told Chandler. "Talk to you in the morning." She yawned as well, and closed her eyes, as she slowly fell asleep. But for some reason she had trouble sleeping, and since this was the case, she had a horrible dream, a dream that she hadn't had since she gave up her daughter. It had been a reaccuring dream, but she had gotten ride of it for a few years. Now it was back. Monica walked down the street, big and pregnant. She hated this part of everything, as she walked herself to the hospital. She had the baby, and held it in her arms. Monica smiled slightly, as she told the doctor's she wanted to keep her daughter. The doctor's told her no, and that she had already made her decision. The only thing different in this dream was that they said they could keep her. She couldn't help but be ecstatic about it. A few years later, however, the little girl passed away. Once Monica's dreamstate took her to the funeral, she shot up, and breathed heavily in and out. She couldn't believe it. She finally settled her breath down, and looked at the clock on her nightstand. Ten am. She nodded, and looked over at the spot next to her. Chandler was't there.

Monica finally got up, and walked slowly across her bedroom floor, and out into the living room. "Hey.." She sighed, as she saw Chandler. "What's up?" She yawned, and slowly walked over to the kitchen, looking at Chandler.

When Chandler spoke to her. "I realized something.." He admitted, and took a sip of his coffee that he had made instead of going downstairs to get some, this was better anyway. "I am going to the doctor for my headaches"  
He admitted. "You've wanted mt to go, and I am going." Chandler told his wife. He was dressed in a suit, and had his untied tie around his neck.

"What you are going?" Monica raised her eyebrow. "I can't believe it!" She couldn't be happier about it because Chandler had been getting horrible migraines. She didn't want to bring up their daughter, not now, not yet.  
She would when the time was right.

"Yeah, I am going." He smiled slightly, and put his coffee cup down on the counter, and kissed Monica on the lips. "I must go." He walked out of the apartment, and went to work, and his doctor's appointment. He came home with not so great news. He couldn't believe it. It was like one of those songs that was about death, and now it was happening to him. This was really bad. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't tell Monica, but he had to.  
When he got into their apartment building, he let out a deep breath, and called out for her. "Monica!" He said, and when she showed up he told her. "You may want to sit down for this." 


End file.
